• Jess

Dating Non-Believers



If you were thinking about dating a non-believer, don’t. It’s not worth it. As blunt as it may seem, there’s actually a lot of reasons which led me to this conclusion. The question isn’t about: can I date a non-Christian? For the Bible says, “I have the right to do anything – but not everything is beneficial.” Rather, the question is: is it wise to date a non-Christian?


My point is: why would you want to hinder your relationship with Jesus? I just don’t see how a Christian, who is on fire for the Lord, would want to date someone who isn’t. For me, it just wouldn’t work out. There’s just something so much more attractive about someone whose heart is truly for the Lord.


I’m a firm believer, that if Christ is the cornerstone of a relationship, it will prosper and everything else will fall into place. However, if Christ is exiled from your circle, it makes room for the enemy to only destroy. If the foundations of the relationship aren’t there, how do you expect the relationship to be built upon? Imagine the one thing you love the most and your partner not understanding why. It just doesn’t make sense to me.


If your religious views don’t line up, then I can imagine that a lot of other views won’t too. Everything I do, stems from my belief in God and His revelation to us through the Bible. That’s exactly why I desire someone who will walk with me on my journey with Christ, keep me accountable and help carry the weight of my Cross, rather than someone who’d weigh me down and hold me back from entering into a deeper relationship with the Lord.



Our journey of faith already is as steep as climbing up a mountain. Now imagine having to climb up and drag the other person along with you. Instead of focusing on Jesus, you’re now focused on the other person slipping up, when instead both of you should be on a mutual journey of faith together.


If I’m living my life according to the Bible and my partner is living according to the world, it just seems like we’re both travelling in different directions and that’s not something I’d want, personally. Ultimately, I’d want my partner to reach Heaven with me…


“Don’t become partners with those who reject God. How can you make a partnership out of right and wrong? That’s not partnership; that’s war. Is light best friends

with dark? Does Christ go strolling with the devil? Do trust and mistrust hold hands?”

2 Corinthians 6:14-18 (MSG)


The Bible is so clear when it comes to discerning who believers should surround themselves with. We may think God doesn’t care, but the reality is that as God’s children, we are set apart. In a society that often abuses the word love, as a synonym for lust, it’s hard to figure out who truly is authentic and who isn’t.


Many of us end up giving unqualified people second interviews, when they weren’t even supposed to get past the first interview. We become tired and lonely and end up with mediocrity, rather than waiting patiently on God to provide the right person for us.


People desire to be in relationships but forget that relationships require commitment. We want someone to hold our hands, but we don’t want to put the power to hurt us, in their hands. Yet in a society that advocates casual sex, believers are called to date intentionally, with an aim and purpose oriented towards marriage. If your core beliefs don't line up, then it would be a lot more complicated when kids arrive and compromises have to be made.


A lot of girls jump into relationships thinking that they can change the guy, but the truth is you can’t change someone, you can only change yourself. There are just certain things that I’d want to be on the same page about, before even getting into a relationship with that person. Otherwise, it’s so easy to give into temptation when you become pressurised into “pleasing” your partner, when deep down you know that’s not something, you’re okay with.


Don’t backtrack on your personal beliefs just to suit someone who probably wasn’t right for you in the first place. Don’t sacrifice the one thing that is actually good in your life, for someone who could easily just come and go. The time that you are single, is the time that you can really establish what you want in a future partner. Remember God’s not holding back relationships from you, He’s holding back relationships for you, for the right time…

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Created By Jessica Fernandes